Сложные проблемы всегда имеют простые, легкие для понимания неправильные решения
Название: Special Short Short «Put A Lid On It»
Автор: Tomo Takabayashi
Иллюстрации: Temari Matsumoto
Сканирование: Lavender Prime
Источник: второй том манги
Язык: английский
Дисклаймер: все права у Томо Такабаяши
Саммари: Юри, Конрад и Вольфрам плывут за Моргифом. Почти сразу же после отплытия Юри обнаруживает плакат, обещающий магическое шоу для детей, вот только на корабле нет и не предполагалось ни одного мага! Юри, не в силах допустить детского разочарования, решает устроить шоу сам, с Конрадом в качестве помощника. Далее спойлеры для нечитающих на английском:Для показа Юри выбирает аттракцион по пронзанию человека в ящике мечом, вот только ни он, ни Конрад не умеют делать этот фокус… В итоге Конрад предлагает трюк по исчезновению человека из ящика (роль которого исполняет обычный дорожный чемодан), Юри забирается туда – только чтобы выяснить, что а) никакой секрет трюка ему раскрывать не собираются, просто Конрад хочет его проучить за то, что Юри уже дважды сбегал из-под его охраны, и б) плакат вообще-то старый, с прошлого круиза, его просто забыли сорвать.
Личное впечатление: очень органичный кусок ККМ-мира, Юри полностью в характере, любящий его Конрад не упускает ни одного случая немного над ним постебаться (извините, народ, но это так и есть!). Что касается Вольфрама, то он тут чисто для галочки, у него морская болезнь. Читать стоит в основном ради Конрада
читать дальше"Can you do any magic tricks?"
It came out of nowhere and Conrad was silent for a moment, Yuri had disappeared for a few minutes, then came running back, the sound of his shoes clicking on the deck. The moment he opened the door, those were the first words out of his mouth. Conrad even forgot to beg Yuri not to leave his line of sight.
"Sorry, you must be wondering why I asked that all of a sudden."
After Yuri apologized, Conrad finally replied, "Oh, no, you don't need to apologize..."
"No, it was too abrupt. It's just that you can do anything, so I thought you might be good at magic tricks too."
"Magic tricks?"
"Yeah. See this? Here, it's terrible."
Yuri handed a single sheet of paper to Conrad. It seemed to be an advertisement taken off a pillar somewhere. The flyer must have been meant for children since it was written in big letters and short sentences. There were even some words that Someone just learning the language, like Yuri, could understand: kids, entertainment, great tricks, show, let's have fun!
"By tricks they mean magic tricks, right? So I thought, there's gonna be magic, right? This is a luxury cruise ship, so there'll be dinner with a magic show, right? Something the kids can enjoy. So I stopped a crewmember who was walking by and asked him what kind of magician would be performing."
Conrad sighed quietly. They had hardly left port, and yet his master, Yuri, had already disappeared on him twice. Even though it was one of his charms, there was such a thing as being too energetic.
Even after he changed the color of his hair and eyes, Yuri's appearance still drew attention. Though not as striking as Wolfram, he still stood out among the humans. It was a good thing that the crewmember was a good person.
Yuri, himself, didn't even consider such things, however. He was in disguise, so everything was all right. He was a completely average commoner. With those feelings boosting his confidence, Yuri continued his story.
"But according to the crewmember, there isn't a single magician on board! They weren't even planning on taking one on board. Can you believe it? They advertise a magic show, but they don't even have a magician on board! Who's going to perform? The bearded captain?"
"I don't know..."
"Of course not! So, Conrad, this must be a plot to defraud children. They tell them that there'll be an incredible magic show, so even kids who don't like boats will get on the ship. All for selfish parents who want to spend a romantic evening at sea, or are too scared to get on a plane."
"In that case, aren't the parents the con artists?"
"It does turn out that way. Can you believe it? Parents are conspiring with cruise lines to lie to their kids. For the sake of that show, the kids are putting up with seasickness and a long night of waiting. They must plan on telling them it was canceled at the last minute or something like that. It's unforgivable, right?!"
Yuri was quite a picture, clenching his fists and breathing heavily, all for other people's kids, whom he'd never even met. In the first place, he called it fraud, but it wasn't even clear that there were any victims. A strong sense of justice is a good thing, but an overactive imagination can be a problem. Conrad wondered just how many children there were on board, bearing with seasickness in the vain hope of seeing this show, if any.
There was one adult on board, however, who could not bear seasickness. Conrad stopped unpacking their luggage and looked around the opulent stateroom. Wolfram, who had joined them on the ship via subterfuge, had taken over the entire luxurious bed. Following his glance, Yuri quickly lowered his voice.
"Oh, sorry. I almost woke up Wolf."
"What do you plan to do?" Conrad asked, suppressing his laughter. He could already imagine how Yuri would respond, grabbing his shirt near the breast pocket, puffing up his chest, and declaiming in a strong voice, his eyes shining, despite their changed color. On top of that, Conrad even knew what he would say.
"I'm saying, Conrad, I have to do something about this!"
Conrad couldn't ask a question like, "Why must you, of all people, do anything?" and he didn't even try a bit of hesitation like, "I'd really like to help you, but..." However, it wouldn't be interesting to just respond with, "I understand," so as Conrad closed the lid to the suitcase, he said, "We'll do it together." Conrad, of course, wouldn't even allow himself a moment to make Yuri feel guilty for getting him involved.
The plan that Yuri had in mind was unusual for a shy person like himself. He proposed to master a magic trick-simple enough for even a beginner to learn-before dinnertime. Then he'd gather the children around and show them the trick. According to him, the difficulty of mastering the trick in a very short time was nothing when compared to the sight of innocent, smiling faces.
"I wonder what kind of a magic trick kids would like. Maybe something like pulling a dove out of your sleeve, or a rabbit from a hat."
"It would be best to have something that looks fancy, but is actually a very simple trick."
"I'm asking just to be sure: you do know what a magic trick is, right, Conrad?"
"I saw a show once, in Las Vegas. How about you?"
"Magic? Of course I do. I've seen it many times. When it looks like someone will win the championship, it lights up. You start to set impatient whether it's lighting up for you or not."
From his tone of voice, he was probably talking about baseball. Conrad never knew there was a related term that sounded similar.
"And then there's when a batter hits a homerun right along the base line, and it goes foul at the last second. Or when he doesn't even hit a breaking pitch, but gets a strike instead."
"That's more like misjudgment than magic. Oh, don't start getting depressed by your own words. Get hold of yourself, Yuri. You're going to do a fun magic trick that will make the children happy, right?"
"R-right."
Pushing himself up from the suitcase he'd been leaning on, Yuri stood as he did so, he seemed to have an idea. He stroked the leather box. It looked big enough to hide a person.
"I think it has to be the box."
"What about the box?"
"The one where you put a beautiful girl in a box and then stab it with a bunch of swords. It's a pretty common trick, but my heart starts pounding every time I see it done. You wonder if the girl inside is okay. Man, it was pretty exciting for me as a kid."
"Oh, that," Conrad nodded, a smug look on his face, and pointed at the suitcase he had just unpacked.
"Let's practice a little. Come on, get inside. I'll stab you carefully from the top."
"What? I'm the one who's going inside?"
As Conrad pulled his sword from its sheath, Yuri's face started to change color. He stepped back, away from the box.
"I-I don't wanna die."
"It's all right, just trust me."
"No, no, it's not a matter of trusting you! You can't tell by just watching, but there's always a trick to magic. It might look like the guy is just stabbing the swords in, but he makes it so the girl can avoid them inside. If we do this," Yuri tapped the leather suitcase making a loud hollow thump, "using this normal box without any secret tricks, then you'll definitely stab me in the throat."
"Hmm, perhaps I should go inside then."
"Huh?"
"It's all right. For you, I won't hold a grudge, no matter where you stab me." Conrad tried to say it with a smile, but Yuri didn't catch the joke.
"Hold on! Magic tricks aren't about enduring pain!" He seemed to be afraid of actually piercing something with a sword. Yuri waved his right hand in front of his face, and desperately started to fish for an excuse. "Besides, no matter who gets in the box and who stabs it, even if we do it right, I'm not sure the audience will be satisfied. Then we'd really have some pain to endure."
"Is that so?'
"Yes, yes. I think it'd be more exciting for them if we ask someone from the audience to help."
"Oh, then please choose the body builder lady, that gu...person who walks around wearing a shirt that shows off her bulging biceps. She won't complain either, no matter where you stab."
"Th-there's no way I can do something that horrible to a woman!"
Conrad saw that no matter what, he'd never be able to do something dangerous to another person, whether man or woman, so he said nonchalantly, "It can't be helped, then. Then let's forget about the box-stabbing trick altogether and try miraculous teleportation, the illusion of escape."
"Illusion...Conrad, you mean…"
"It's all right, leave it to me. I've seen it done a few times. Let's use this suitcase as it is. Just get into the box, and I'll tell you how to get yourself out."
"What? But, you're not even psychic or anything."
Even so, Yuri opened the suitcase, which hap been full of clothes not long ago, complaining under his breath. He must have thought it would be safe as long as there was no stabbing involved. Swinging his legs one by one into the box, he sat down in the center, hugging his knees. There was easily enough space for a grown man to crouch inside.
"Now what?"
Those eyes looking up at you would make anyone want to sympathize with him, but now was the time to have a heart of steel, or rather to become a stern guardian. Conrad quickly closed the lid, and fastened the lock with a click.
"I've caught you now."
"Huh? What? Hey, wait! Wait a minute! What do you mean you've caught me, Conrad? How am I supposed to get out?! What part of this is the illusion of escape?! Don't tell me you planned to lock me up all along?!"
Even though Yuri was generally a bit slow on the uptake, he quickly realized what was happening and started to bang on the wall of the box from the inside. It was quiet at first but gradually became louder as he got desperate. Conrad could even feel the vibration through his shoes.
"I really didn't want to do this, but unless I lock you up, you'll just keep disappearing."
"Huh?! What are you talking about, Conrad? Don't tell me you're mad because I went to explore the ship by myself without telling you! I can't help it. It's common knowledge that you should check for emergency exits when you're staying in a new place! Besides, we won't have time to learn a magic trick by dinnertime if you waste time playing a childish prank like this!"
"Knowing where you are is more important to me than the illusion of escape."
Conrad knew that there'd be no end to where he'd go. There may be doors obstructing his direct route, but he'd break them down no matter how many times he had to hit them. Conrad sat on top of the box and decided to enjoy the muffled voice, at least for now. He knew it wouldn't be long before he gave in and opened the lid. Of course, he would be the one to give in.
"By the way, Your Majesty, here's what was written on that piece of paper 'Summer vacation! A fabulous cruise with entertainment for kids of all ages. Let's have fun this summer with fishing during the day and fireworks and a magic show with great tricks at night!' It does sound fun, but Yuri, I have bad news for you."
"Wh-what?"
"The summer season in this area is extremely short. It ended before we even arrived."
"What do you mean?!"
"I mean..." Conrad pounded with his fist on the top of the suitcase. "Unfortunately, on this trip, there will be no fireworks or magic shows."
Though Conrad wasn't sure whether he had been listening to their conversation or not, Wolfram, who was supposed to have been sleeping, slowly got up and muttered, "They just forgot to take down the poster."
That's a direct way of putting it...
Автор: Tomo Takabayashi
Иллюстрации: Temari Matsumoto
Сканирование: Lavender Prime
Источник: второй том манги
Язык: английский
Дисклаймер: все права у Томо Такабаяши
Саммари: Юри, Конрад и Вольфрам плывут за Моргифом. Почти сразу же после отплытия Юри обнаруживает плакат, обещающий магическое шоу для детей, вот только на корабле нет и не предполагалось ни одного мага! Юри, не в силах допустить детского разочарования, решает устроить шоу сам, с Конрадом в качестве помощника. Далее спойлеры для нечитающих на английском:Для показа Юри выбирает аттракцион по пронзанию человека в ящике мечом, вот только ни он, ни Конрад не умеют делать этот фокус… В итоге Конрад предлагает трюк по исчезновению человека из ящика (роль которого исполняет обычный дорожный чемодан), Юри забирается туда – только чтобы выяснить, что а) никакой секрет трюка ему раскрывать не собираются, просто Конрад хочет его проучить за то, что Юри уже дважды сбегал из-под его охраны, и б) плакат вообще-то старый, с прошлого круиза, его просто забыли сорвать.
Личное впечатление: очень органичный кусок ККМ-мира, Юри полностью в характере, любящий его Конрад не упускает ни одного случая немного над ним постебаться (извините, народ, но это так и есть!). Что касается Вольфрама, то он тут чисто для галочки, у него морская болезнь. Читать стоит в основном ради Конрада
читать дальше"Can you do any magic tricks?"
It came out of nowhere and Conrad was silent for a moment, Yuri had disappeared for a few minutes, then came running back, the sound of his shoes clicking on the deck. The moment he opened the door, those were the first words out of his mouth. Conrad even forgot to beg Yuri not to leave his line of sight.
"Sorry, you must be wondering why I asked that all of a sudden."
After Yuri apologized, Conrad finally replied, "Oh, no, you don't need to apologize..."
"No, it was too abrupt. It's just that you can do anything, so I thought you might be good at magic tricks too."
"Magic tricks?"
"Yeah. See this? Here, it's terrible."
Yuri handed a single sheet of paper to Conrad. It seemed to be an advertisement taken off a pillar somewhere. The flyer must have been meant for children since it was written in big letters and short sentences. There were even some words that Someone just learning the language, like Yuri, could understand: kids, entertainment, great tricks, show, let's have fun!
"By tricks they mean magic tricks, right? So I thought, there's gonna be magic, right? This is a luxury cruise ship, so there'll be dinner with a magic show, right? Something the kids can enjoy. So I stopped a crewmember who was walking by and asked him what kind of magician would be performing."
Conrad sighed quietly. They had hardly left port, and yet his master, Yuri, had already disappeared on him twice. Even though it was one of his charms, there was such a thing as being too energetic.
Even after he changed the color of his hair and eyes, Yuri's appearance still drew attention. Though not as striking as Wolfram, he still stood out among the humans. It was a good thing that the crewmember was a good person.
Yuri, himself, didn't even consider such things, however. He was in disguise, so everything was all right. He was a completely average commoner. With those feelings boosting his confidence, Yuri continued his story.
"But according to the crewmember, there isn't a single magician on board! They weren't even planning on taking one on board. Can you believe it? They advertise a magic show, but they don't even have a magician on board! Who's going to perform? The bearded captain?"
"I don't know..."
"Of course not! So, Conrad, this must be a plot to defraud children. They tell them that there'll be an incredible magic show, so even kids who don't like boats will get on the ship. All for selfish parents who want to spend a romantic evening at sea, or are too scared to get on a plane."
"In that case, aren't the parents the con artists?"
"It does turn out that way. Can you believe it? Parents are conspiring with cruise lines to lie to their kids. For the sake of that show, the kids are putting up with seasickness and a long night of waiting. They must plan on telling them it was canceled at the last minute or something like that. It's unforgivable, right?!"
Yuri was quite a picture, clenching his fists and breathing heavily, all for other people's kids, whom he'd never even met. In the first place, he called it fraud, but it wasn't even clear that there were any victims. A strong sense of justice is a good thing, but an overactive imagination can be a problem. Conrad wondered just how many children there were on board, bearing with seasickness in the vain hope of seeing this show, if any.
There was one adult on board, however, who could not bear seasickness. Conrad stopped unpacking their luggage and looked around the opulent stateroom. Wolfram, who had joined them on the ship via subterfuge, had taken over the entire luxurious bed. Following his glance, Yuri quickly lowered his voice.
"Oh, sorry. I almost woke up Wolf."
"What do you plan to do?" Conrad asked, suppressing his laughter. He could already imagine how Yuri would respond, grabbing his shirt near the breast pocket, puffing up his chest, and declaiming in a strong voice, his eyes shining, despite their changed color. On top of that, Conrad even knew what he would say.
"I'm saying, Conrad, I have to do something about this!"
Conrad couldn't ask a question like, "Why must you, of all people, do anything?" and he didn't even try a bit of hesitation like, "I'd really like to help you, but..." However, it wouldn't be interesting to just respond with, "I understand," so as Conrad closed the lid to the suitcase, he said, "We'll do it together." Conrad, of course, wouldn't even allow himself a moment to make Yuri feel guilty for getting him involved.
The plan that Yuri had in mind was unusual for a shy person like himself. He proposed to master a magic trick-simple enough for even a beginner to learn-before dinnertime. Then he'd gather the children around and show them the trick. According to him, the difficulty of mastering the trick in a very short time was nothing when compared to the sight of innocent, smiling faces.
"I wonder what kind of a magic trick kids would like. Maybe something like pulling a dove out of your sleeve, or a rabbit from a hat."
"It would be best to have something that looks fancy, but is actually a very simple trick."
"I'm asking just to be sure: you do know what a magic trick is, right, Conrad?"
"I saw a show once, in Las Vegas. How about you?"
"Magic? Of course I do. I've seen it many times. When it looks like someone will win the championship, it lights up. You start to set impatient whether it's lighting up for you or not."
From his tone of voice, he was probably talking about baseball. Conrad never knew there was a related term that sounded similar.
"And then there's when a batter hits a homerun right along the base line, and it goes foul at the last second. Or when he doesn't even hit a breaking pitch, but gets a strike instead."
"That's more like misjudgment than magic. Oh, don't start getting depressed by your own words. Get hold of yourself, Yuri. You're going to do a fun magic trick that will make the children happy, right?"
"R-right."
Pushing himself up from the suitcase he'd been leaning on, Yuri stood as he did so, he seemed to have an idea. He stroked the leather box. It looked big enough to hide a person.
"I think it has to be the box."
"What about the box?"
"The one where you put a beautiful girl in a box and then stab it with a bunch of swords. It's a pretty common trick, but my heart starts pounding every time I see it done. You wonder if the girl inside is okay. Man, it was pretty exciting for me as a kid."
"Oh, that," Conrad nodded, a smug look on his face, and pointed at the suitcase he had just unpacked.
"Let's practice a little. Come on, get inside. I'll stab you carefully from the top."
"What? I'm the one who's going inside?"
As Conrad pulled his sword from its sheath, Yuri's face started to change color. He stepped back, away from the box.
"I-I don't wanna die."
"It's all right, just trust me."
"No, no, it's not a matter of trusting you! You can't tell by just watching, but there's always a trick to magic. It might look like the guy is just stabbing the swords in, but he makes it so the girl can avoid them inside. If we do this," Yuri tapped the leather suitcase making a loud hollow thump, "using this normal box without any secret tricks, then you'll definitely stab me in the throat."
"Hmm, perhaps I should go inside then."
"Huh?"
"It's all right. For you, I won't hold a grudge, no matter where you stab me." Conrad tried to say it with a smile, but Yuri didn't catch the joke.
"Hold on! Magic tricks aren't about enduring pain!" He seemed to be afraid of actually piercing something with a sword. Yuri waved his right hand in front of his face, and desperately started to fish for an excuse. "Besides, no matter who gets in the box and who stabs it, even if we do it right, I'm not sure the audience will be satisfied. Then we'd really have some pain to endure."
"Is that so?'
"Yes, yes. I think it'd be more exciting for them if we ask someone from the audience to help."
"Oh, then please choose the body builder lady, that gu...person who walks around wearing a shirt that shows off her bulging biceps. She won't complain either, no matter where you stab."
"Th-there's no way I can do something that horrible to a woman!"
Conrad saw that no matter what, he'd never be able to do something dangerous to another person, whether man or woman, so he said nonchalantly, "It can't be helped, then. Then let's forget about the box-stabbing trick altogether and try miraculous teleportation, the illusion of escape."
"Illusion...Conrad, you mean…"
"It's all right, leave it to me. I've seen it done a few times. Let's use this suitcase as it is. Just get into the box, and I'll tell you how to get yourself out."
"What? But, you're not even psychic or anything."
Even so, Yuri opened the suitcase, which hap been full of clothes not long ago, complaining under his breath. He must have thought it would be safe as long as there was no stabbing involved. Swinging his legs one by one into the box, he sat down in the center, hugging his knees. There was easily enough space for a grown man to crouch inside.
"Now what?"
Those eyes looking up at you would make anyone want to sympathize with him, but now was the time to have a heart of steel, or rather to become a stern guardian. Conrad quickly closed the lid, and fastened the lock with a click.
"I've caught you now."
"Huh? What? Hey, wait! Wait a minute! What do you mean you've caught me, Conrad? How am I supposed to get out?! What part of this is the illusion of escape?! Don't tell me you planned to lock me up all along?!"
Even though Yuri was generally a bit slow on the uptake, he quickly realized what was happening and started to bang on the wall of the box from the inside. It was quiet at first but gradually became louder as he got desperate. Conrad could even feel the vibration through his shoes.
"I really didn't want to do this, but unless I lock you up, you'll just keep disappearing."
"Huh?! What are you talking about, Conrad? Don't tell me you're mad because I went to explore the ship by myself without telling you! I can't help it. It's common knowledge that you should check for emergency exits when you're staying in a new place! Besides, we won't have time to learn a magic trick by dinnertime if you waste time playing a childish prank like this!"
"Knowing where you are is more important to me than the illusion of escape."
Conrad knew that there'd be no end to where he'd go. There may be doors obstructing his direct route, but he'd break them down no matter how many times he had to hit them. Conrad sat on top of the box and decided to enjoy the muffled voice, at least for now. He knew it wouldn't be long before he gave in and opened the lid. Of course, he would be the one to give in.
"By the way, Your Majesty, here's what was written on that piece of paper 'Summer vacation! A fabulous cruise with entertainment for kids of all ages. Let's have fun this summer with fishing during the day and fireworks and a magic show with great tricks at night!' It does sound fun, but Yuri, I have bad news for you."
"Wh-what?"
"The summer season in this area is extremely short. It ended before we even arrived."
"What do you mean?!"
"I mean..." Conrad pounded with his fist on the top of the suitcase. "Unfortunately, on this trip, there will be no fireworks or magic shows."
Though Conrad wasn't sure whether he had been listening to their conversation or not, Wolfram, who was supposed to have been sleeping, slowly got up and muttered, "They just forgot to take down the poster."
That's a direct way of putting it...
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12.10.2013 в 13:21